As excited as I am to embark on being an event planner, it is much harder to find work. Most of the companies that called me in for an interview was falsely advertised as an event planner but they really wants you to stand outside the store and persuade people to sign up for something. I am looking for an opportunity but I will not stand outside the grocery store, DMV or any place as such to beg people to sign up for a wireless phone, cable service, or to win a trip. You only get paid off of how many people signed up. I am not a salesperson. Ugh it is so hard, so I decided to look for internships. They told me I need to volunteer. Now it is the waiting period of an organization to contact me about volunteering. It is exhausting. All I want is a chance!! In the meantime, I am looking for work in other fields. I am not ready to return to Detroit.
Also it is aggravating when I talk to people the first question asked is “Do you find a job yet?” Then the next remark is “You should just go back to teaching or subbing?” I could scream!!! No, I do not or will I go back to teaching. That negates Gods word on telling me it was time to quit. I won’t go back and that I know. Even though I don’t have a job and it is hard. I won’t go back to a life where I was suffocating. It is a job looking for a job. I can spend 8 or more hours a day looking for work. The internet never shuts off. I have many sleepless nights. I keep telling myself they don’t have the faith I have. It is so hard to not curse them out for two reasons. One, they are just concerned and trying to help. Two, they don’t know that is the first question everyone ask. Seriously, chill on asking, once I get a position or my circumstance changes I will let everyone know.
I am not ready to leave New York yet. I don’t feel like my assignment here is complete. I felt it in my soul when I left Detroit. I left a clean slate. Here, I have people who depend on me in ways that I can’t explain. If I go back to Detroit, I will be an evil Bitch and anti-social. I love my new life that I gained since quitting and my apartment is so perfect for me. I love the location, size, price, amenities, landlord and neighbors. At this point, I am running out of money, so I NEED a miracle. I have been blessed to be a lender. I am God’s child and I hold on to his promises. I think He is making room for my gifts. I have to stay optimistic.